Lessons in Humility

By Holly Shuck

My husband and I have been married 18 years, and throughout the years and seasons, we have learned (and relearned) many spiritual lessons. I am grateful God has put me in the right place at the right time to work His purposes in me. But, I must confess, I do have the occasional, fleeting thought that the current circumstances are insane, and I might just drop dead at any second.

As a child, I expected life to work out just the way I planned—a country house with a wrap-around porch on acres of rolling prairie, with a horse or two grazing in the distance. I dreamed of the perfect husband who would be handsome and quite rugged, of course, and who would leave for work every day at the same time to provide a living for our small family. Our children, I imagined, were perfect in body and mind, always dressed nicely, and very well behaved. I even pictured a family dog in my thoughts, and he never aged (or got sick and vomited on the imaginary living room rug).

I dreamed of being the mom who stayed at home to provide a neat, clean home for this perfect family to enjoy. I would cook dinner and always have enough groceries in the cabinets and refrigerator. I guess money was always available for the taking in my dreams, because I never remember thinking about a day when 14 dollars was as unattainable as a million. Ah, but the Bible says: “When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man I put away childish things” (1 Corinthians 13:11).

(Not) Living the Dream

My husband Travis, though the handsome and rugged man of my dreams, has not always gone to work every day at the same time. In fact, the Lord saw fit to make me a pastor’s wife, and a pastor’s daily life is anything but predictable.

This is only one indication that the life I had dreamed about was as unrealistic as the Tooth Fairy, and I’m sure it will come as no surprise that I don’t live the fairy tale life I imagined.

I have a moderately-sized family of four children, two dogs, and a cat. My home is not in the country, nor do I have a wrap-around porch. If horses are grazing in the distance, I certainly can’t see them through the windows of our rented, suburban home. I certainly couldn’t describe my children as “well behaved” every day, and the family dog has not only vomited on the living room rug, but on occasions, leaves behind pungent gifts as well. I find an occasional note written in the dust on my coffee table, and some days, the neighborhood McDonald’s provides the evening meal. As you might imagine, money certainly does not grow on trees and groceries are sometimes scarce.

Yet, as the Apostle Paul wrote to the church at Philippi, I, too, am learning, “in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: everywhere and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” (Philippians 4: 11-13).

This has not been an easy lesson to learn, but as a family, we try to be obedient to the Lord’s call in our lives. As a result, we recently left a full-time pastorate at an established church to help an up-and-coming mission work. We moved from a comfortable home, two steady paychecks, and a familiar lifestyle to a whole new set of circumstances. We knew it was a step of faith, but we had no idea how many challenges we would encounter, or how it felt to be totally dependent on God. In the days and months that followed, we quickly learned both lessons.

A New Season

It was late when we arrived at the pastor’s house. As we unloaded our belongings, I reassured the pastor’s wife, “This is just temporary. I promise we will not impose on you for very long.” She smiled graciously and said, “As long as it takes.”

In the following weeks, we encouraged our children to be brave as they entered new schools and faced the reality of making new friendships. We encouraged them to take comfort in knowing we had made the right choice in following the Lord’s call no matter the cost. All the while, behind closed doors and in the quiet of the night, Travis and I grieved our own losses and suppressed our own anxieties over the step of faith we had taken.

Although we had bought, sold, even built homes before, for the first time in our married lives, we had no home to call our own. Two long months later, through God’s miraculous provision, we moved into the house next door to our pastor. Because the owner of the home was moving to Japan and needed an immediate renter, we were blessed to rent a beautiful home at an exceptionally low monthly payment and keep the kids in the same schools. I was sure it was the start of a terrific new season in our lives.

Before long, I learned it was a new season all right—terrifically terrifying! My husband’s new job barely paid a third of the income we needed, and I had been unsuccessful at finding employment. Then another new challenge arose. Sometime earlier, I had committed to donate a kidney to a friend’s small child. One week after we moved into the new home, the transplant coordinator called to inform me that the kidney donation would take place two weeks later.

Suddenly, the happy new season in our lives turned into a nightmare, with a heavy layer of burden on our hearts. Who would care for my children while we were out of state for the operation? Who would pay the bills? Who would take care of the family dog that needed special care?

In the past, we had thanked God for His provisions and blessings, and we always said we depended on Him. During these dark days, we reached a new level of dependence, and we realized the superficiality of our previous statements. As frightening as the situation became, we experienced one awesome blessing after another as our church family lovingly obeyed Jesus’ command to His disciples: “He answereth and saith unto them, He that hath two coats, let him impart to him that hath none; and he that hath meat, let him do likewise” (Luke 3:11).

All in the Family

We were strangers to our new church, but one by one, every need was met, even exceeded. We were awestruck and humbled to be supported completely by other believers. As the weeks passed, we saw God’s hand at work through others. We received food, rent, gas, Christmas presents, even emergency airfare. Our children were treated with great kindness, and the new church family often invited them on outings and paid their way when we couldn’t have provided for them. They truly fulfilled the command of Scripture, “But to do good and to communicate forget not: for with such sacrifices God is well pleased” (Hebrews 13:16). I’m sure God was pleased.

I know that others were watching as my family and I endured hardship and received care from our Christian family. Maybe they were looking for failure or maybe they were looking for encouragement. In either case, I am reminded that these seasons of life and their lessons not only have the ability to sanctify me but to bless and encourage others.

These most recent lessons in life have been the most difficult, the most humbling, and yet the most treasured of all my married years. If you can be even a little blessed by my blessings; if you can catch a slight glimpse of God’s great provision; if the overwhelming support our church provided can be even a small encouragement to you, then the hardship we endured is even sweeter to me.

Even if my childhood dream could become reality, I wouldn’t trade God’s way for my own, no matter the seasons of hardship past and seasons of hardship in the future. The five-year-old kidney recipient is healthy and well with my “big beautiful kidney” (his mom’s words), and I have learned to trust in the Lord with my heart, without leaning on my own understanding.

Through the difficulty, I have learned to acknowledge him, and I trust that He continues to direct our paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). The Lord knows I am not begging for struggles, but I’m serious when I say “If it sanctifies me, if it encourages others, if it glorifies God, then so be it.”

“For of Him and through Him, and to Him, are all things: to whom be glory for ever. Amen” (Romans 11:36).

About the Writer: Holly Shuck and her husband Travis are members of the church planting team at Church 180 in Clarksville, Tennessee. To learn more, visit http://180church.net.